Circumstances are not what makes us happy or unhappy

Circumstances are not what makes us happy

or unhappy

Circumstances are not what makes us happy

or unhappy. Think about it: if money was

enough to make us happy, there should be a

lot of people walking around saying, “Wow,

thank God I got that last raise! Now I have

enough money, and I am happy!” Yet I’ve

never heard anyone say that. Most rich people

seem to be quite unhappy, in fact. If fortune or

fame worked, you would never see movie stars

and rock musicians with drug problems—they’d

be too happy to be interested in drugs.

Similarly, possessions do not cause happiness.

If they did, wouldn’t we be happy by now? I,

for one, have bought a lot of awesome things,

but the only ones that have made a long-term

difference are the ones that are involved in

doing something: my spinning wheel, my

kayak, my convertible. The things themselves

don’t matter much, but doing fun things with

them adds joy to my life.

Another thing that won’t make you happy is

whitewashing over reality and feeding yourself

a lot of bogus affirmations that you know

aren’t true. Any philosophy that requires you

to deny reality is a false path. In fact, studies

have shown that insincerity is every bit as bad

for your heart as anger.6 Your body feels the

tension between the truth and the way you’re

acting, and finds it very destructive. It’s

important to look for the good in a situation,

but it’s even more important to be real.